Creative careers and announcing pregnancy: How, when to tell or not to tell.

Announcing pregnancy in creative careers... To tell or not to tell, in the early stages that is the question.

Wait the 3 months to announce it? Tell it to the closest people before because emotional, psychological support is needed?

To be fair there is not one correct way of doing it, I am almost 5 months and I only feel like I want to share it with the world slowly now. Of course I have told my family and closest friends already but it has been amazing to keep it as our little sacred news with my partner and our families for a while.

I want to address today the sticky feeling of announcing it when having careers linked to looks, appearance.

In “normal” jobs there is already the dreading feeling of announcing it, of being scared of being seen differently, that somehow it feeling like we are shooting a bullet down our own foot regarding our careers. We would love people to not see us differently but at the same time be considerate of our new situation, we would love to not be belittled regarding our capacities and what it means for the future of our job.

So as you can imagine for careers where how you look is at the forefront… the dreaded feeling was definitely there. I felt guilty not because I was ashamed of being pregnant but I wanted to keep it for myself as long as I could because I knew all hopes of working would reduce drastically, but I could not do it for much longer because even if the bump was not visible, my usual size was not fitting me anymore…

In my case modelling and acting are heavily relying on how I look, no matter of my skills as an actress. How pregnant I look is something that is taken into account by productions because of insurances mainly but as well because of the presence of a bump can affect the story and what kind of character I can play (Surprise! There are not much variety in what a pregnant woman can play…). It is possible to get auditions where they REQUIRE a pregnant woman but it is very rare.

In a way I am thankful that I am not getting that many auditions because there would be a risk to do well at an audition and seeing that the start of the filming of the project is close to the due date or during the time I will want to stay with the baby for the first few months… So it is an on-going “I want to work but I don’t want it to affect how I want to care for my baby”.

It took me a while to announce it to my agencies and the people I am working with. It is happy news but when announcing it to those professional circles (no matter how kind and nice they are), there is this imminent feeling of: this reduces my chance of getting a job even more. It is quite frustrating considering how already unstable those industries are and weeks, months can go by without working. And the times where you want to work the most are those months before the due date, to be able to have some savings that will make life easier…

Regarding modelling we are hoping for the bump to make a bigger appearance to be able to use it to our advantage and book some maternity clothing shoots as those weeks where I’ll be properly showing and still able to work won’t be for that long… So we will try to make the most out of it :). It has been a hard pill to swallow to see the difference in work offers, especially because I am full of energy, able to work, and do not show that much so I could still be doing a lot of filming, shoots etc. (Using the advantage of having that Pregnancy skin glow, come on! That’s real! Haha). So yes I had a hard time with accepting and navigating this. Not resenting the pregnancy but resenting how it changes and affects how we are seen and how opportunities shrink.

Now I am much more at peace with it, I am trying to go with the flow, finding other venues to feel supported financially and keep my brain and energy active.

I decided to see it as well as the Universe giving me the time to nurture my body, my soul and my mind to provide the best environment for baby to develop, to be more in my "feminine energy". It has been a hard switch to activate as wanting to provide financially still pops up here and there.

I am always thinking “Money will always come back, but the times where your baby is so small and needs you so much won’t” so I will need to remind myself that when Baby will be with us as well. And while Baby is still cosy and warm in my belly, I am reminding myself that I will never live this pregnancy again, it is a unique time that I want to enjoy, to feel fully every stages and to put it at the forefront for once as up until now career has always been at the forefront. So, moral of the story:

There is not set, correct way to do it:

• If you want to announce your pregnancy earlier than what other people, do it

• If you want to keep it between you and your partner for as long as you can, do it

• If you have a career that relies on looks, you can either announce it when you don’t fit your normal clothing size, or you can wait until your properly show and only notify them of your size change without explaining why (I know some actresses did not announce it until it was very obvious, only do that if you have a low risk pregnancy, do not put yourself under strain to hide it and risk it for the sake of a job of course)

• Remember that this pregnancy is unique, you won’t be going through this exact one again, so soak it in as much as you can :)